The Role of a Husband

Ephesians 5:22-28

Every member of the family has responsibilities according to their God-given role.  A husband’s responsibilities are laid out in the Bible as three “L”s: Love, Lead, and Labor.  All these describe the protective and stabilizing influence the husband is to the household.


Husbands love your wives (Ephesians 5:25-28).  Your wife is a part of you.  Love is characterized by these things:

  • Selflessness: John 15:13
  • Understanding: 1 Peter 3:7 (empathizing – seek to understand her), Psalm 103:14 (recognizing limits)
    • She needs to know she is meeting your needs
    • She needs to know you delight in her as a person
    • She needs your attention and quality conversation
    • She needs affection that doesn’t lead to the bedroom
  • Communication: James 3:17 (description of how the Lord communicates)


Husbands lead your families (Ephesians 5:22-24).  From the beginning God set up the divine order in the family.  Adam is created and then God makes an help meet for him (Genesis 2:18).  Leadership is characterized by:

  • Modeling the behavior you want to see.
  • Vision: Joshua 24:15 (Joshua for his family).  Genesis 41:25-40 (Joseph and one of the greatest chapters on leadership in the Bible.) Where are you going? Why are you going there? How are you getting there?  Implementation of vision – many steps between a great idea and a great product.  Vision is a start, but just because you want to do something doesn’t mean it will happen. You must put footsteps with the vision.
  • Teachability (apt to teach) – you are part of your wife’s spiritual growth.  You will help her, and your children if you have them, grow up to be more like Jesus Christ.
  • Equitable judgment
  • Wisdom: hard to ask your wife to hitch her wagon to someone who consistently makes bad decisions or is indecisive.


Husbands labor to make provision for your household (1 Timothy 5:8)

  • Philippians 4:19
  • Job 1:5 – Job makes spiritual preparation for his household and not just financial provision.  What good is a family that is well taken care of and all winds up in Hell?