Rearing Children Ps. 127: 3 CLICK TITLE FOR AUDIO
Ps 127:3 – Children are an heritage of the Lord. Therefore, rear them for the Lord. To “rear” is to raise them upright; to bring them to maturity through nurturing care. Pray for them. Emphasize being good more than doing good.
Train them – Prov 22:6. Andrew Murray said, “Without training, teaching and commanding often do more harm than good.” Bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord [Eph 6:4]. Help them understand the purpose and the expectations of your training. They must know that the things of the Lord come before other things, like sports. And they must learn that your decisions concerning all things are always based on what God says.
Command them for obedience – Keep my commandments, and live [Prov 4:4]. Jer 35:1-10; these are not suggestions; these are rules. Abraham commanded his children [Gen 18:19]. You don’t need your children’s consent.
Be on the same page – Prov 6:20-23 – father’s commandment and mother’s law are “it” in verse 22. Make some of the decisions about laws and commandments before the children are born. Then back each other and don’t do it different ways when one is gone or out of the room. The kids know how to manipulate the differences. You can easily see when your spouse is giving in. It’s much harder for you to see when you are giving in. The kids see it all.
Be consistent in enforcement – Eph 6:4 – the children can’t win. Your children should already know what’s coming. But don’t provoke them to anger when you do this. David said of the Lord, “… thy gentleness hath made me great,” [Ps 18:35]. Dr. Shelton Smith said, “Make your soft voice as authoritative as your mad voice. Anger is not a tool for success. Eliminate it from your arsenal.” “For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God,” [Jas 1:20].
Discipline them – the kids are different. They need to know you are the boss, what you says goes, and they must respect you. You have to beat one [Prov 23:13-14], just look at the other one [Prov 20:8], and take something away from the third [Col 3:25]. They must understand that sin brings consequences and the consequences match the offense. Start early [Prov 13:24]. Keep it up as long as you have hope [Prov 19:18]. A young lady was being a brat during her final fitting before her wedding. Her mother peeled her out of that wedding dress and spanked her right there.
Set up boundaries – Prov 30:11 – there is a generation that curseth… but they can’t do that in your house. Bad circumstances are not an excuse for bad behavior. Boundaries keep you from crossing into territory into which you shouldn’t go and they keep your children from crossing into territory into which you cannot let them come. They are out of bounds if they do.